On Trusting the All Knowing God with My Unknowns
I knew change was coming, but I had no idea where, when, or how.
I served full-time at church. My salary was set. I sat in a beautiful office with wall-to-wall windows and a private entrance. I led worship for women’s meetings along with two prayer gatherings a week with heart-type friends. In many ways, I had it good. Yet my heart was not at rest.
I knew that I knew. Change was coming. Don’t ask me how I knew. I just knew with that never ending and ever-present groaning inside. God had more in store. It was during this season that a Scripture would come to mind.
By faith Abraham, when called to go to a place he would later receive as his inheritance, obeyed and went, even though he did not know where he was going. Hebrews 11:8 NIV
I was willing to go into the great unknown, but how? All I knew was that the Lord wanted me to trust Him enough that I would go. Just go. He would be with me every step of the scary, and at times, deeply lonely path laden with tears and consternation..
Stuck to the left of my desk was a Scripture handwritten in large letters.
Trust in the LORD with all your heart And do not lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge Him, and He will make your paths straight. Proverbs 3:5-6 NAS
I kept this verse before my eyes during the few years that I prayed about this impending transition. It held me steady and drew me higher. My job was to acknowledge God in all my ways. He would work out the details, even if it was one-step-at-a-time.
One of the ways He directed my path was through the ever increasing and deeper “knowing” that I was to obey Him. It became unmistakenly clear. I was to step out as Abraham did and go, even when I did not know where. One thing was certain though. God did know! My job was to trust and obey. It was then…
I learned the art of trusting my all-knowing God with my unknowns.
Don’t get me wrong. I had plenty of doubt, fear, and heartache while leaving my familiar, but I stuck to the plan. Acknowledge God’s Presence with me. I wrestled in prayer and wondered if I missed it, especially when others thought I was crazy and out of God’s will. Nonetheless, that agonizing groaning to trust and obey beckoned me onward.
His Presence often appeared invisible and undetected in my mind and emotions. Yet, that inner “something” was stronger than the void of outward reinforcement. I knew that I knew. Stay honest. Stay focused. Keep my eyes on Jesus, and acknowledge Him in all my ways. I began to realize.
The Lord was more interested in my obedient trust than He was on making it clear.
From this place of honestly acknowledging God in all my ways, I took small steps that led to more small steps. Little did I know how fulfilling and ever-increasing the fruit of my life could become. It led to; chaplaincy with beautiful residents in senior living, serving with a ministry where ladies gather on retreats from churches throughout our region, completion of a two-year training as a certified spiritual director, completing a five-year ordination process with Open Bible Churches, and pursuing my passion of writing.
Most importantly, these accomplishments barely scratch the surface of the deep heart work wherein; God restored my soul, enlarged my vision, and increased gentle confidence. There are no words to describe the depth of God’s goodness that appeared as…
I trusted and acknowledged His presence in all my ways.
Some-how. Some-way. He got me where I needed to be, when I needed to be there.
I am forever grateful,
Mary